ahhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!! tonight is the last night here, i can't get over it. i know i said i would be keeping it updated on the count down... but when your busy and you stay out till god knows when it's hard to stay up and write.

i have never laughed and smiled so much in life. i have never fully been this content on things. deep down i'm sad as hell about shit. i'm leaving my family. i'm leaving my mom and dad, i'm leaving my brother and nephew. I'm just leaving and i'm not fully okay with it. it sux being in love. its the best feeling in the world. cloud 9 can't compare to how i feel. at the same time of feeling so happy it can also hurt knowing that you're leaving and most importantly when you feel like they don't feel the same. i've never felt so comfortable in someones arms and i have never ever cried so much cuz it hurts. my last night is spent with family. and with my tears on my pillow cuz i know i won't see him.

in like six months i haven't been on here for the most commonest reason... i forgot my password.

anyways i  been sitting around being a loser for the last six months because i can't find a job. but i been beading like a maniac. i can do this i keep telling myself. i like having my money but i don't like stabbing myself with a needle to do it... i have some massive calluses on my finger tips. you could swear i was a diabetic because of it.

this summer i have swam, cooked, beaded, assisted in an outfit. I have pow wowed a little bit and most importantly i have made up with my cousin aka my sister. I love her so much that life is dole without her in it.